Soap

I am actually very extremely busy right now that I shouldn't be typing anything here but I think I need a breather. I am in rage/hulk mode currently that it distracted me from doing the things I should be doing. It's week 11 for uni already, 1 Psychology essay on eating disorder due next next week, final year Psychology research paper due same week, 6 online tests due the same week too. And my first paper is on 3rd Nov, finance paper which require full preparation on each week tutorial which I was too busy to be doing. And with the situations I have to faced every day, I am under time constraint and stress almost every second of the day. I am not exaggerating as if I am some celebrity which is so damn busy but you don't know me so you don't know what I need to go through every single day. Unstable meal times, insufficient sleep, headaches, weight loss, constant rushing around and etc, I know is unhealthy, but things won't give me a break.

I am easily rage lately because of all those reasons and especially for those people in my life that always give me fucking excuses on IMPORTANT things, I mean come on, if I ask you out for yamcha then you said your goldfish died and you need to have a funeral in the toilet for your precious goldfish then I don't fucking bother. But, its uni related and work related and financial related, you give me excuses like "I don't wanna wake up so early', 'I got work', 'It's far', etc., FUCKING STUPID OKAY! I can wake up early, I got work too, I stayed further than you, I travelled to you too, then why I can and you can't? FUCKING ASSHOLES !! (this assholes applied to a wide range of people in my life).

Yes, you may see me as a hyper unresponsible kid because I am always jumping and hyper when I am around with people (family and close friends), I am always the one making stupid jokes, annoying faces and etc, I always don't go for lectures (never change I know :s), I always dress slumber, look chillax. Yea, I used to be very unresponsible and never actually realised there's more things in life than those that I priority in, but after what had happened, what I've been through since last year end, I swear I am more mature than some people that is 25 and still putting stupid stuffs as their priority. I may look small and childish, but no, I've became much more serious in things that need to be serious with and there's more things in life to learn and go with than our average little bubble.

So I grew up, those assholes around me have to start growing up! I've seen a lot but there's much more for me to see and learn in life and much more space to grow up with but I dare say, I bet my life on it, I am much more mature than some people in my life that are few years older than me.

Ok, done raging. I am out.

Months ago. The contrast of what I am feeling right now.

Till then.